This past weekend, I visited a shop here in Phnom Penh that has a great reputation - "Daughters". This shop helps girls and women transition from sex work to 'functional living' by having them work in a sewing shop making items to be sold in "Daughters". (There's also a restaurant/cafe that employs these ex-sex workers as well). The money spent in the shop by customers then goes to funding therapy and education classes, I'm assuming, to help these women adjust to life outside of the sex work world. Surface level, this seems like a great organization, right?*
Whilst in the shop, I came across the "Sons of Cambodia" label on some items. I bought these items below because I thought I was doing a good thing. It didn't strike me until I had a conversation and did some research that I realized I had made a big mistake. I felt sad, offended, and disgusted. On all of the tags at the shop, there's some information about how the "Daughters/Sons" organization is 'helping' people:
When you look on the website, this is what is written under the "Sons of Cambodia" tab:
Can you see the wrong?
What's written above is wrong on so many levels. These 'boys' are not boys, for starters. They're GIRLS/WOMEN. Through "Sons of Cambodia", "Daughters" is demeaning lives and violating human rights. "Sons" think they're helping by having these women work and deny their true identities and actually pride themselves on successful 'transitions' back into male lifestyles. Don't believe me, this blog post excerpt from daughtersofcambodia.blogspot.com should prove this:
Sokun says his anger toward himself and others is reducing and, in an outward sign of his inward transformation, says he wants to start dressing like a man again.
The above excerpt is from a blog post is titled "Sokun's Shame" as if being transgender was a shame. Please read it for some emotional insight into this organization.
If you're going to truly save these women and make a difference, start by recognizing them as women. There shouldn't be a "Sons of Cambodia" label for the ladyboys because they're, in fact, "Daughters" too! Why not accept them for who they are and offer them employment options outside of sex work AS FEMALES? Sadly, employment opportunities for transgender women (and men) in the world, let alone in Cambodia, are limited so why isn't "Daughters" recognizing this and REALLY trying to make a difference here? Sadly, it all boils down to a religious conundrum.
Why can't we just be good people trying to help others without an ulterior motive? You know, 'non-believers' can be pretty extraordinary, helpful, caring, giving and open-minded people. I know I'd never expect anything in return from anyone I help nor would I begin harping on about my beliefs or my faith with an expectation that they'll follow suit. At the end of the day, we're all entitled to believe in what we believe in. However, you should do good things and help others because it's the right thing to do...not because it's dictated by your faith or religion.
*For the record: Sex work is a career that is shunned by a majority of people, abused by many others and that has been around forever. I think there will always be sex work, whether it's legal or illegal, so why don't we start thinking about ways to make it a safer practice?
